MBP Land
Because of my super-extended hotel stays, issues with the apartment building water-supply, nightmare-pace business trips, this place is pretty much devoid of any personal touches (not to mention, blankets, a TV, extra pillows, a robe, slippers, oh, and of course - food) as I have had zero time to acclimate to my own Stockholm apartment. Dang!
Water, Water everywhere, but Not a Drop in My Sink
Just a quick blurb here. I was in my apartment for approximately 1 week when I got a notice that the water was being turned off for about a 5 days due to contruction in one of the building’s units. Nice. I just got here and now I have to find some place that has water? Dang!
SO, as luck would have it, a co-worker was heading back to the States for about a week. How convenient, huh? So, I stayed there for the 5 days while my building was under construction. Cute place he had. I of course, ate all of his food and drank all of his beer (no exaggeration). I felt just a little bad about it, but I got over it as I thought that if I wasn’t there, everything would have gone bad anyway, well, except for the beer - which was hellagood!
SO, I left there and headed back to my own waterless apartment to see what was what. Water in water closet? Check. Water in kitchen? Check. Water in bathroom?........Let’s try that again. Water in bathroom?....NOPE.
(Just so you are aware, my toilet and shower are no where near each other in the apartment.)
I found out that construction wasn’t going as easy as planned. Water flowing through a broken pipe just happens to feed almost everyone’s shower room in this building. No one had working showers. Nice. If I wait 4 more days, it might turn on. I realize this is Europe, and some habits may not always translate overseas, but my God, 4 days is a damned long time to not be near any soap don’t you think?
So, as luck would have it, I was scheduled to be on a business trip (or an away mission as I like to call them) for about 4 days. How convenient, huh? By the time I got back from my trip, all water should be where it should, God willing.
Place your Head Between your Knees and Kiss your Sanity Good-bye
I was scheduled to leave Stockholm for Brussels, Belguim. I get to the airport (no panic attack, thank you very much) only to learn that the flight might take off a "bit" late as they had to fly in a replacement plane.
Did you read that last sentence? Here it is again, just in case. "I get to the airport (no panic attack thank you very much) only to learn that the flight might take off a bit late as they had to fly in a replacement plane."
I’m thinking, this cannot be a good sign. It’s not like you got a crack in the windshield of a car you are renting, so they offer to hand you keys to another car. This is a friggin replacement plane they had to fly in. The best part, the clerk told me (yet another crazy-flight-lady in my life),told me to my face, that the pilot is not as familiar with the model they are bringing in, so that’s why there might be a "bit" of a delay.
WTF. I start to freak out so bad, I was calm. Does that make sense? I figured, this won’t end well, I expect it to be a disaster so f*ck it, enjoy another crazy-ass-ride in Michelle-land. I had such a serious urge to watch Airplane!
I hate being right all of the time.
Langoliers
In summary:
Plane leaves 1 hour late. 20 minutes in the air, the flight crew keeps looking out of the windows and then speaking quite quietly to each other. 10 minutes later, they and close the curtain so we can’t see them talking quietly to each other.
A few more minutes in the air, we get notice on PA system "We are having landing gear technical problems and will have to return to Stockholm."
Did you read that last sentence? Here it is again, just in case: "We are having landing gear technical problems and will have to return to Stockholm."
Well, of course we are having technical issues with our landing gear! It’s not like none of us couldn’t hear the damn front wheel wheezing and whirling trying to get back into’s it bay. This is no shock.... afterall, we’re in Michelle-land now!
So, we land OK back at Stockholm but that’s it. We just land and move a few meters on the runway....maybe a bit to the right, but not much.
Buses show up to cart us miles away to the airport, where, we are given directions, in Swedish, on what to do next. Of course I had no real idea what was said - just context to work with and the crowd of angry passengers to follow and be swept away with.
I tried to get someone who looked like they might work for an airline to help me find a way to get to Brussels that night. Unfortunately, as the entire flight was trying to do what I was doing, I did not get very far.
So, I spent 2 hours on a plane only to arrive at my departure point. Did you read that last sentence?
Arrived at my departure point 2 hours later. Trippy. I was having visions of the Langoliers by Stephen King as it seemed like no one except for the passengers on the plane we just de-boarded was around.
I called the co-worker I was supposed to meet in Brussels that evening and said I’ll see him sometime in the afternoon tomorrow if I cannot find a way out tonight. After getting an earful of advice on what to do, how to do it, when to do it and what I was doing wrong, which really pissed me off as - had he understood EVERYONE was trying to rebook a flight to Brussels, I decided who gives a sh*t if I make it in at 3 a.m. or 10 a.m.? Either way, I’m not going to be in a meeting until 1 p.m..... C’mon people!!! Work with me here!!
Livin’ it up at the Hotel Arlanda
So, I stayed at the most po-dunk little Swedish motel known to man.
Hilarious. The rest of the Langoliers flight (about 80% of them) stayed at the same hotel to all leave again together on the same flight to the same destination the next morning. About this time, I began thinking about one definition of insanity: repeating the same action over and over again and expecting different results.
I hung about with some nice people while we drank our one (as in single, solitary, lone, companionless, sole, and unaccompanied) complimentary watery beer.
The rest of the Langoliers, as a whole, were really nice people. Well hell, we spent most of the damned day together and nothing brings people closer together than a flight emergency landing, frantic airline clerks, bad airport food, lost luggage, hill-billy hotels, and absolutely no customer service.
So, eh, all in all not a bad day in Michelle-land.
I’ll fill you in later on what happened after I made it to Brussels (finally) , quick layover in Munich, Germany and eventually Italy (Venice, Porcia and Pordenone).
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